Corona | Coming Attractions

Quasar wrote:

I imagine Goits and Jubbers walking around with notepads jotting down everything the other one says. Also, keeping the notepads when they're not together, writing down their own witticisms and exchanging notes when they get together. Then they read each other's list out loud, then write them down again as they'd now been said by the other person.

This notepad is called Corona Coming Attractions.

"And then I watch videos of people expressing their dogs' anal glands, because, you know, that's just what I do."

I immediately followed this statement by grunting through severe back pain and saying, "You married one sexy motherfucker."

If we could get video documentation of all these quotes, it'd be appreciated.

"Why do Germans equate a snake drinking out of a martini glass with health?"

This is a fucking lie. German snakes drink Liebfraumilch.

Apparently, even the snakes in Germany speak English.

Everyone speaks English. However if it wasn't for our Grandfathers we would, apparently, all be speaking German.

I think Goiter is starting to become delusional.

ME: "It's going to be warm this weekend."
GOITER: "Cool! Let's go to the funeral... theater... uh... cemetery!"

Pfft.  Like you've never called a cemetary a "funeral theater" before.

Jubbers knows how to spell "cemetery".

Goits doesn't.

Jubbers > Goits

I usually do.  I downloaded Pet Sematary earlier in the week (turned out to be a fake, so I wound up trying to watch as much of it as I could on YouTube), and I guess that last "a" just stuck with me.

I probably would have caught it if I had been smart enough to switch to the plain text editor.  The rich text editor doesn't allow spell check to work.

Sure, blame the rich. Occupy HTML!

Quasar wrote:

Jubbers knows how to spell "cemetery".

To be fair, I originally spelled it "cemetary"but then a squiggly red line appeared letting me know that it was wrong, so I changed it.

In other words, you were smart enough not to type in the rich text editor in the first place.

Damn the 1%!

I'm surprised you German residents can use anything but the rich text editor.

Also:

The Swollen Goi... wrote:

I downloaded Pet Sematary earlier in the week (turned out to be a fake, so I wound up trying to watch as much of it as I could on YouTube),

It's so cute that Goits is still trying to download stuff!

I downloaded Drive and Real Steel.  They turned out to be real.  I look forward to watching them.

I'm curious what your version of Pet Cemetary ended up being.  Was it about a house full of Penthouse Pets that started killing each other, then rising from the dead to have sex with strange men?

It was one of those dummy Universal logos that lasted about seven seconds, but somehow took up 700MB of space.

Virus!

No virus.  I'm too clever for that!  I'm practically Family Guy clever!

At McDonald's here they have a deal where you can get 40 Chicken McNuggets for 10 Euros. Goiter got that tonight, ate a good portion of them, boxed up the rest, and then turned to me to say:

"You know why these Chicken McNuggets can blow me? Because they're fe' later."

I wasn't sure whether to post this here or in "Amazing Puns." He does this quite often, and then looks at me expectantly to acknowledge his genius.

If you posted this in 'Amazing Puns' then you would have been mistaken!

Are you going to be in Munchen for Xmas?